Friday, September 30, 2005

It's Friday, homeslice. s.

It's Friday. It's Random. It's Ten.

Um...Ten songs.

You know the drill by now, I'm sure.

1. Time Bomb--Rancid
2. Falling Down--Pin Monkey
3. Bleeding Out--Insanetuary
4. Come Undone--Duran Duran
5. En Casa--La Ley
6. Tits on the Radio--Scissor Sisters
7. All Day and All of the Night--The Kinks
8. This Is What I Do--Rhett Miller
9. Safety Dance--Men Without Hats
10. Hey--the Pixies

Freshwater Collins: CD Release Party (insert interview here)

Freshwater Collins is a great band out of Milwaukee, WI. I've seen them 3 times now, and I continue to be impressed with them. The first time I saw them, they won me over with their ability to play both Johnny Cash and Bob Marley in the same set, and do them both justice. And there are few bands that can satisfy my dual desires for hard-core rocking, and chilling at the same time. When they take the stage, there is much kicking of the proverbial ass. For sure.

But every time I see them, the crowd is pretty weak. Which is unfair, because they're really one of the best bands I've seen come through here. So, I've decided to adopt them, and promote them like there's no tomorrow.

I thought that a great way to start would be an audioblogger interview with the lead singer. Of course, I wasn't counting on the fact that I can really be an idiot sometimes.

Here's the end result:

this is an audio post - click to play

So, I really am sorry Chris. You did a great interview. But I'm not so good with phones. Grrr.

You can check them out on MySpace and hear some of their stuff. They also have a website here.

Everyone who reads this seriously needs to check them out. And then tell a friend. Or eight.

If you don't, I will hunt you down.

And you know I'm not joking. I'm crazy like that.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Drumroll please....

Take note of the new tag-line. I liked everyone's suggestions here (especially barn's definition and Jensenblue for the mere suggestion that I might, in fact, be a femme fatal), but the winner of the metaphorical cookie is one of the delinquents I work with.

Most of the boys lately have been obnoxiously telling the other staff how much cooler I am than they are. It amuses me.

We asked one of them about it the other day....why he says that all the time, and why he thinks I'm so darn cool.

His response was:

"Well, everybody's cool sometimes. But she's just cool all the time. I don't know why."

I dig that.

My co-worker's later response was: "'re really popular with the sex-offenders, aren't you?"

Which came in a close second for the tag-line contest.

Hey...I actually remembered that I CAN audioblog.

this is an audio post - click to play

OK. I lied. That wasn't actually (I say "actually" a LOT when I talk, apparently....I did not know that before I listened to this post. sorry about that.) quite all the mindlessly banal chit-chat about my phone after-all.

You know how phones nowadays come pre-programmed with some frequently used messages for you to text-message other people with? Like, "Yes," "No," "Call me," etc.

Mine has those too....but I think my phone also has problems with priorities:

"2. Let's meet."
"7. You've gotta be here to enjoy this."
"8. Would you like to join me for a date tonight?"

"Would you like to join me for a date tonight?"

Swear to god, that's exactly what it says.
WHO talks like that?

Although, it's so funny to me, I may just start randomly sending that text message to everyone.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005


I hate it when I pick up a new user manual for something, and it takes me, like, a whole minute to realize that I've got it upside down and I'm reading it in Spanish. I really hate that.


It's a well known fact that moderate phsyical activity is a great cure-all for the doldrums, right?

So, my question is: Do you think that grave-digging counts?

Because that's what I did this morning.

It was for a dog (not mine).

A BIG dog.

So there was plenty of physical activity to be had.

But somehow, I think I'm actually more down than I was when I started.

So I think that whole theory is whack.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

It was a dark and neon night....

I needed a change of blog-pace, so I switched things up a bit.

I really think the new banner is in need of a clever tagline, but I'm all tapped out of cleverness.

A metaphorical cookie and my undying respect and adoration go to anyone who can think of a good one.

Holy hell...

0 and 3?!?!?!

The Packers may kill me this season, if this keeps up.

On the semi-bright side, I didn't even bother to watch the end of the game and caught "Just Like Heaven" instead. It was surprisingly not that sucky, as far as schmaltzy romantic comedies go.

Friday, September 23, 2005


It's 1:30pm.

I'm still in pjs and flip-flops.

I need to leave for work in 30 minutes.

15 minutes if I want to get food on the way.

Suddenly my "I don't want to get dressed" crisis has become a race against time.

But I'm not running very fast.

In other news, this morning I gave my father the task of finding a new home for my Vikings-Saints tickets for Sunday's game. I got all choked up when I handed them over...NFL tickets are a hard thing to part with. And they were all shiny and pretty.

But, my partner in crime had his flight canceled due to the hurricane. And I don't much feel like going to a the game by myself. (Or, god forbid, with a Vikings fan.) So, hopefully they will find a new family to love them and let them run free in the fields and chase squirrels and whatnot.

I'll probably still be in my pjs on Sunday afternoon anyway.

It's Friday

But I don't really care.

The amount of energy required to open a media player, and then type the first 10 songs doesn't really seem worth it today.

So, for today, let's just assume it's a given that I have good taste in music.

For now I have a bigger concern.

The satin pj pants and "Hardcore" t-shirt I wore to bed seem highly inappropriate to wear to work this afternoon. Yet I don't picture myself bothering to change out of them anytime in the near future. This is a dilemma.

EDIT: Maybe the pj's would be ok afterall.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

I love a false sense of urgency.

I got this urgent looking envelope in the mail today. Warning me that something was about to expire.

So, I opened it, thinking it was my subscription to Entertainment Weekly or Rolling Stone, or something else that I actually value and want to continue receiving.

Instead I found this:

Alas, my subscription to "Working Mother" magazine is running out. The subscription that I never asked for, never paid for, and really don't qualify for.


Those of you who are long-time-listeners-first-time-callers around here may remember that I blogged about the first issue of the magazine that came to my door. I remember thinking that it was probably a mistake, or a promotion, and it would stop soon enough.

But it didn't.

It's been coming every month like clock-work. Much like my period. Which has also come every month like clock-work. Because I HAVE NEVER BEEN PREGNANT. And I like it that way.

I like how the letter informs me that with this special rate, it's like getting "every issue for less than $.89!"

Except, that's like $.89 too much. Considering that I am not a mother of any sort...working, not-working, retired, etc. etc.

They also promise to "keep my needs in mind." Uh huh. Clearly, they are not very good at this.

It's not even that great of a magazine, in my opinion. No movie reviews. No perfume samples. No pictures of Joaquin Phoenix. What's the point?

They can keep their "Lactating at Work?" and "Understanding Bullies" articles to themselves. Thank you very much.

Monday, September 19, 2005


Avast maties!

It be International Talk Like a Pirate Day again!

I almost forgot, until the lovely and talented HFB reminded me.


Well whole family's famous today.


Except me.

Anyone who uses Yahoo! Mail has probably noticed their new sign-in page design. With random pictures of random people that change every time you hit "refresh."

One of those random pictures happens to be my random brother, Jason.

My dad and I found the picture accidentally one night a couple weeks ago, and thought it looked like him. But Jason has now confirmed that it is, in fact, him. Posing for publicity photos for the Professional Disc Golf Association.

Proving that he is cooler than me.


This makes me sad.

I don't really like to mention family members here. But some of you I talk to were already aware of the health struggles my Uncle Bobby has gone through in the past months. He's one of my very favorite people in the whole world, and our whole family has been incredibly concerned for him.

Late last week he made the announcement that he's leaving his job indefinitely, for health reasons. I finally had the heart to read the articles about it this morning. And it made me very sad. At the same time, it made me incredibly proud of him, to read that so many other people think as highly of him as I do.

No one is better at their job than he is.

And few others have made it as far as he has without sacrificing their integrity to do so.

We should all be so lucky.

Friday, September 16, 2005

When punctuation attacks

See if anyone can guess WHY I will choose not to attend my company picnic:

If you guessed:

"Because Flamingo is the type of person who would refuse to attend any event advertised using 53 exclamation points on a single flier,"

you would be correct.

Also acceptable:

"Because the decorative paper was put in the printer upside down, making it look like those are dead bugs, and dead bugs do not put Flamingo in the Picnic Spirit."

Friday. Bah Humbug.

Wow. What a rotten week. Not really, really rotten. Just exhausting. I'm sick of work. All of it. And I don't want to go today. So I can't even be excited that it's Friday.

But here's the music.

1. Necessito--Some Girls
2. Sunday Girl--Blondie
3. Born Too Late--The Clarks
4. Taste It--INXS
5. Glory--Liz Phair
6. Lovers in the Backseat--Scissor Sisters
7. Hey Girl--O.A.R.
8. Redondo Beach (live)--Morrissey
9. Black Gold (live at the Prom)--Soul Asylum
10. Good and Gone--Caesars
"Shut the lights, shut the shades, make it all go away."
Sounds about right for my week.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

It's that day again.

I suppose I should say something to mark the 4th anniversary of You-Know-What, before the clock strikes midnight.

But I don't really have anything to say about it.

Except that today, on my way to work, I stopped to get just enough gas to get me there and back, and 2 bottles of Diet Coke. The total came to $9.11. I thought that was creepy, and commented on that....but the clerk didn't really get it.

He did say he liked my "Jamaican Me Crazy" t-shirt though.

And thus ends my September 11th post.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

I'm not going to post anything today.

Oh damn. Oops. Too late.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Friday Random Ten:

The "I can't think of a particularly clever edition" Edition

1. Come on Eileen--Dexy's Midnight Runners (a song that is now forever linked in my mind to Ian McGibboney.)
2. That Was a Crazy Game of Poker--O.A.R. (If songs were places, THIS would be my "happy place)
3. Bizarre Love Triangle--New Order
4. Moonshadow--Cat Stevens
5. Girl's Attractive--Diamond Nights
6. Half the Man--Stone Temple Pilots
7. Bizarre Love Triangle--Frente! (Well now...isn't THAT an interesting random turn of events?)
8. There is a Light that Never Goes Out--Morrissey (God I love this song.)
9. Bloomington--Old 97s
10. I Don't Know--Ellis (if you've never heard Ellis, you're really missing out. She is utterly amazing, and I love her.)

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Well, now. THIS isn't a good sign...

I was playing around with the 43 Things website, where you list 43 goals for your life. (It's totally cheesy, but kind of neat, all at the same time.) You make your list, check it twice, and then you find out what other people have the sames goals. It's all very touchy-feely.

Well, when I made one particular, and fairly innocuous, entry....I saw this:

Damn...that CANNOT be right. Who puts "Commit Suicide" on their Life-goals list? And WHY do they also want the same things I want? That's creepy.

Monday, September 05, 2005

Things I am Realy Good at

When life gets crappy, I’ve found that the best solution is a delicate mix of avoidance and regression. Now, granted, this “solution” doesn’t actually solve anything. It just feels good for a while.

Today I had the task of going through a big tub of papers my mother had saved from my days in school. Amusing schoolwork, art projects, scribbles, photos, etc. I had to decide what was worth saving and what could be chucked in the bin. Not an easy decision.

One of my best discoveries was a journal from Reading class, dated Spring 1989.

I learned a lot reading that journal:
  • I was a funny little kid back then.

  • My writing was quite parenthetical, even at age 9.

  • I seemed to be weirdly obsessed with rabbits at that point.

  • Seriously.

  • I sound like Lenny from Of Mice and Men.

Here are a few excerpts that I particularly enjoyed, my 9 year-old spelling and grammar intact:

My Favorite Animals are:
1. Horses
2. Rabbits
3. Dogs
I want to be a vetranariyan when I grow up.
I think animals are neat.
I like horses, rabbits and dogs the most, because they are all nice pets and are easily trained.
I guess I could say that animals are my hobby.
What Makes Me Laugh….
Baby rabbits when they hop around.
Funny jokes because I just can’t stop from laughing.
Clowns because they always do something funny, and all I can do is laugh.
Funny faces because they seem so stupid.

Ice cream
Summer (not the girl)

Spinich (not raw)
Hogs (the people kind)
Mean Cats
My cousin Bill

And this is my personal favorite:

I am Realy Good at:
Riding horses (I am realy good at that)
Writing storys
Making people laugh
Taking care of animals
Raising rabbits
Flying kites
Putting on mine, and other peoples make up
4-H projects
Squeezing into small places

*I was either lying or completely lacking any sort of self-awareness. I sincerely remember being terrible at piano.

Saturday, September 03, 2005

I've had it.

Everyone has their emotional breaking point. And I guess this is mine.

I wouldn't normally blog in this state, but I'm online, and it's handy.

We've just spent almost a whole week watching episodes from that new reality show "Presidentially Inept," and now he gets to hand pick himself another Supreme Court justice. Wonderful.

I'm pissed at Rehnquist for dying. I'm pissed at Bush for any number of things. I'm pissed at Homeland Security for fucking things up so badly down south. I'm pissed at the Republicans in Washington for being pricks, in general. I'm pissed at the Democrats in Washington for being spineless milquetoasts, not standing up to these bullies, and basically selling us all out for politics. I'm pissed at anyone who seriously voted for four more years of this bullshit. I am pissed at anyone who, however subtly, claims that the people left in New Orleans deserved what they got. I'm pissed at the national news media for, basically doing what they always do. I'm pissed at a whole lotta people. Too many to keep listing. Plus, the energy one gets from rage tends to burn out quickly, and then leaves you exhausted.

And I am. I am really tired. In every way.

Friday, September 02, 2005

Must hear

If you haven't heard Mayor Ray Nagin's radio interview today, you must take 12 minutes out of your day to listen to it. Or if you can't listen to it, ASAP, at least read the transcript.

And in a related note, what the hell is with this?
"FEMA director Michael Brown said Thursday that the agency had just learned about the situation at the convention center and quickly scrambled to provide food, water and medical care and remove the corpses."
What, NO ONE in FEMA has cable? Or even local stations, for god's sake? Or internet? Or newspapers? That is, by far, the most ridiculously hideously stupid quote I've read today. But it's still early.

Friday Random Ten:

The Reluctant Edition.

"Reluctant", because this means I have to stop listening to Death Cab for Cutie's Plans. And I don't wanna. This new cd makes me happy. It's like comfort food for my ears. Like musical mashed potatoes. I bet Bed Gibbard's girlfriend makes him sing her to sleep every night. That's what I would do. That lucky bitch.

Anyway. On with the other stuff. Other inferior stuff. Hmph.

1. Sour Girl--Stone Temple Pilots
2. She Don't Use Jelly--The Flaming Lips
3. Criminal--Alix Olson
4. I'm Waiting--The Watchmen
5. Of Montreal--The Stills
6. How Soon Is Now--The Smiths
7. Borrowed Bride--Old 97s
8. That Kind of Love--Alison Krauss
9. Love on the Rocks with No Ice--The Darkness
10. Divorce Song--Liz Phair

OK. Those were pretty good songs, I'll admit. But back to Death Cab now.

Thursday, September 01, 2005

"I immediately regret this decision!!!"

(And if you don't immediately recognize that quote, I'm not sure we can still be friends.)

On my way to work tonight, at 5pm, my car was running low on gas. Roughly 8 blocks from work, my warning light came on. I debated whether to stop right then, or to wait and get gas on my way home at 11:30. I hate stopping for gas late at night, but I also hate being late for work. So, I made the decision to push on, clock in on time, and get gas on the way home.

As I drove past the gas station, I noted the price: $2.89. Ouch!

So, after a long evening with the delinquents, I headed home. Stopping at the gas station, I was so tired that I didn't even bother to look at the price. I was half-way through the gas-pumping process before I noticed the illuminated numbers below the pump.



THAT woke me up.

30 cents in one shift. That's insane.

In all seriousness, if this particular trend continues, I realize now that I may have to rethink my current employment situation. Which sucks.

Anyway, the moral of the story is, I'm a dumbass who should've gotten gas earlier in the day when I had the chance.